it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
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