That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
Randomize
