Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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