im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize
