I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
Dick very happy bro
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