Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
