so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
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