he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Randomize
