i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
