i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
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