i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Randomize
