I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
