Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize