it wasn't lemon gatorade
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Randomize
