remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
