Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
I'm always down for nudity.
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