Got a toothbrush?
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Randomize