Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Randomize
