dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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