Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
So squirting runs in the family.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
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