So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize
