I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
That accounts for only three of the penises
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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