OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
