Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
Be still, my beating vagina.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
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