I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
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