exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
Randomize
