Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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