it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
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