I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
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