i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
