The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
Randomize
