wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I'm going to invent an ap that tests your stress levels before texting and will say something like "nope, go rub one out and try again in 10 min"
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
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