its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Randomize
