Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
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