I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
Randomize
