He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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