Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
Randomize
