Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
