So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize
