I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
Randomize
