It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Staff meetings will be awkward since my boss and I both did the new intern
Maybe she doesn’t know you did him
Oh she definitely knows - it was a threesome
Please tell me you’re not taking life advice from porn scripts again
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