Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
