oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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