Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
