I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
