I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
