Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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