so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Randomize
