Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Randomize
