Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
I am midnight drunk by noon
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
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