he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
The feeling are messing with the penis
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Randomize
